*The Blogger Blitz was dreamt up by Ian over at Adventure Rules

Today’s post is my entry for Round 1 of the Blogger Blitz event hosted by Adventure Rules, and that’s the best place to find details on the concept, rules, and schedule. It’s also where the results will be announced so head on over there to keep track of what’s going on!

The overall silver-shilling of it is that a few of us gaming bloggers have taken up the challenge of pitting our favorite game characters against each other in a tournament of unorthodox challenges. A team of judges will determine which character handled the scenario best and therefore who gets to proceed to the next round.

I selected the quick thinking, zombie fighting, mainstay of the Resident Evil series, Claire Redfield as my competitor. Claire first proved her B.O.W. fighting attributes in Raccoon City on the trail of her Brother, but has become one of the most recognisable figures in the franchise; I most recently guided her through the events of Resident Evil Revelations 2 and, not knowing the details of the endeavor ahead, thought that the combination of brains & combat experience would set her up as formidable opponent. In round one I’m up against Guybrush Threepwood from the Monkey Island series, ably piloted by Kim over at Later Levels

… I happen to know that Kim is something of a Guybrush expert so this won’t be an easy face-off…

Our round one scenario is a simple matter of completing a mail delivery route… with Cerberus, the three-headed demon-dog normally on watch duty at the gates of Hades, in pursuit; he’s generously on loan to make this task just that little bit more challenging. So here is how I think Claire Redfield would handle the situation, but don’t forget to head over to Later Levels to see how Guybrush fared!

… Claire rounded the corner and sprinted down the street, bag strapped firmly to her side. This was one hell of a mail route. Cerberus was pounding the tarmac hot on her heals, fiery breath ripping through the night air, but she was cool; her experience on Sushestvovaine island proved she was fearless¹ and sprinting away from a hell hound was nothing compared to outrunning a helicopter² or any different from the many beasts that had pursued her over the years^{3, 4}. She’d made it from the depot to the burbs by motorbike ⁵ but had ditched it a few blocks back to proceed on foot⁶.

“Just once I’d like a normal job⁷ that doesn’t involve hideous monsters,” she thought as she skidded around another corner, effortlessly flicked a letter into the waiting mailbox⁸, and raised the flag⁹ all without breaking stride.

Her hands fumbled in the bag, “great, only a couple more,”. She posted the penultimate letter before dashing around the final corner and sliding to a halt. The last house on the street faced her, but it was a dead end. Cerberus gently padded around the corner behind her, each of his three-heads grinning; there was no reason to run any longer, she was trapped.

Claire turned to face him, and began slowly walking backwards. She bumped into the mailbox and, without looking, slipped the final letter in. Route completed; now she just had to escape.

Cerberus observed her curiously, she didn’t seem worried. He took another step forward as she un-slung her trademark bowgun from her back. Cerberus’ grin widened, a few arrows wouldn’t hurt him. She leveled the weapon and fired, the spread of three arrows flew over his head¹⁰. 

“Fetch!” she yelled as each of the heads of Cerberus tracked a different one of the ‘sticks’ she had just ‘thrown’ for him. Unable to resist, the hound from hell, struggled and writhed as each head tried to retrieve a different arrow… and swiftly and quietly Claire slid past to freedom.  

1. Claire was infected with a fear activated virus, but controlled her emotions to survive.
2. Intro sequence to Resident Evil – Code: Veronica shows Claire outrunning a helicopter.
3. Tyrant (T-103) in Resident Evil 2 (B Scenario) pursues Claire throughout.
4. Mutated, Steve Burnside chased Claire with an axe (RE:CV)
5. Claire is a biker (Resident Evil 2 intro Sequence)
6. … although her Harley Davidson style bike would be unlikely to corner effectively enough to maintain speed in a winding suburban setting.
7. Despite being caught up in two different zombie incidents, Claire goes on to work for TerraSave who provide aid during B.O.W. outbreaks.
8. Claire has demonstrated a high level of manual dexterity on several occasions; In the RE:CV intro sequence she drops a gun, catches it before hitting the ground, and seamlessly fires it into explosive cylinders.
9. Although not explicitly stated, her accent & Brother’s affiliations to the U.S. military suggest she is a U.S. citizen and hence the stereotypical U.S. mailbox is an appropriate choice.
10. Claire’s bowgun fires a spread of three arrows as standard.